Six minutes of whiskey breathed howling, like some werewolf hybrid of Crazy Horse and Kurt Cobain with a flanged out tinge of southern foreboding.

she’s a cold bitch in honest company

29. Hollaback Girl – Gwen Stefani

One of the catchiest mainstream pop tunes of the decade. There’s a flow to Hollaback Girl and a genuine sincerity one feels from this this listening experience. This is in stark contrast to the other manufactured pop of the decade that is mostly completely devoid of life. Gwen sells it in the video like a coked up infomercial pitchman.

28. Island In the Sun – Weezer

How in the hell are these guys still around? Weren’t they supposed to be a relic of the 90’s, of girls singing and acting out “The Sweater Song” at college parties who are now mothers? Well, the lesson here is that pop culture attachments other music critics lavish on music are worthless garbage for measurement. Simply write a strong melody and the rest will fall into place.

27. The Funeral – Band of Horses

Band of Horses came out of the blue from the Seattle indie scene, and broke ground fast with the help of KEXP in terms of airplay and promotion. A stint on the David Letterman helped as well. There’s a mystical quality to the guitar intro, and a power to the bridge and chorus akin to REO Speedwagon’s finer power ballad moments.

26. Tailspin – The Jayhawks

After parting ways with band founder Mark Olson in 1995, the Jayhawks embarked on a path of stylistic choices that seemed to split critics. Rainy Day Music(2003) was the final Olson-less album and although patchy, contains some of their finest work. The best of that would be Tailspin, with it’s almost heroic tone and addicting chorus. It’s an under looked gem of the decade.

25. Without Me – Eminem

Two trailer park girls go round the outside, round the outside

If you think there’s anything innocent about those lyrics, think again. Eminem was back, and he had the hooks to back him up. It is likely he will not attain these heights again. Everything is working here,from the cynical lyrics, the irresistible sax work and the energized guitar crunch in the chorus.

24. Hold On Hold On – Neko Case

Neko plays the part of the partied out party goer who perhaps is tired of participating. She drives home alone, enjoying some pills, pondering everything. You can almost picture the tail lights of the car tricking through the dark roadways as the loose guitar jumbles up and then spits out again.

23. Bandages and Scars – Son Volt

Farrar’s guitar jumps through your window, punches you in the nose, then steals your car and heads for the highway. The perfect road trip song, a movement for the last days of the highway rambler in this era of climate change – a final celebration of freedom and leaving it all behind while we still can. The guitar pounds and churns like pistons, working with the rhythm section as speed increases. The quick pace is broken by sections of slowdown, perhaps pulling into that rest area for gas, or stopping by that bar out in I80 for some local culture.

The end of an era? Will we become a people who simply live our entire lives inside cities, never again feeling the joy of the open road? Maybe.

22. Mason City – The Fiery Furnaces

The Fiery Furnaces pull off a kind of psych freak Americana that would have been at home on a Buffalo Springfield record with about ten more ounces of LSD and a healthy inhalation of hash. The nonsense lyrics conjure up an old world aura, but the instruments and tone provide a futuristic backdrop. There are many false starts and legit changes in the arrangements, providing intrigue, drama and surprises. Iowa perceived at its best.

21. Diamond Heart -Marissa Nadler

But I look for you
In the traffic seas
And the bars I’m always frequenting

A solemn, heartbreaking ballad sung beautifully. It’s complete melancholy, but with a hint of triumph laced in the arrangement. Nadler will likely be a force in the coming years. Her exceptional voice and great skill in capturing moments like an auditory snapshot are not gimmicks or fad. This one doesn’t need to grow on you, it hits right away.

Pyramid Song (from the mediocre Amnesiac) was released right before Radiohead became hyper self aware, tossing out big ideas and excitement for tame blog critic approval. Inspired by a Thom Yorke dream of girlfriends past and the Charles Mingus song “Freedom”.

39. Rise Up With Fists – Jenny Lewis

Are you really that pure sir? Thought I saw you in Vegas, it was not pretty but she was

A breakthrough for Jenny Lewis. The Laurel Canyon sound with a bit of hick thrown in “whuuuut are you changing?”.

38. Glosoli – Sigur Ros

A summer arctic sounding work conjuring up a slow march and glints of sunlight out of the corner of the eye. Sigur Ros’s finest track.

37. Kids – MGMT

Catchy as hell danceable college dorm pop.

36. Jesus of Suburbia – Green Day

Green Day’s sprawling, never ending sonic tribute to youth confusion and melancholy in suburbia.

35. New Slang – The Shins

A few simple acoustic guitar lines and some haunting background vocals propel New Slang into what feels like an effortless piece.

34. Ashes of American Flags – Wilco

Before Jeff Tweedy tried to become the Eagles without the good melodies, he wrote this great song. Some of the finest lyrics of the decade.

33. Paul Simon – The Russian Futurists

One of the more under the radar pop acts of the 2k’s. The Russian Futurists forged a very modern pop sound but don’t really receive the credit for it. Paul Simon is a celebration.

Sample

32. Said the Spider to the Fly – Paper Chase

Foot stomping beats precede a demented piano which is hammered by ugly vocals. An out of tune string section swerves and collides with the other mess. In the end, the track is like a platypus swimming along the river bank – its parts are ugly, but the overall package is irresistible and beloved.

31. It’s Too Late – The Streets

A warm string section wraps around a spritely drum machine and a spotty, surging timpani. Mike Skinner seems lost in a web of dealers, lost lovers and social appointments.

A newer rock band actually playing their instruments at a competent level as well as making it catchy? As Yoda once said, “there is hope”.

Sample

49. Year of the Waitress – The Eames era

Cute dork rock taken to its highest level. At times, the lead vocals just kind of fizzle out in the left channel as the singer tries to act “whatever”, but it works.

48. Coyotes – Richard Thompson and Don Edwards

The heartbreaking featured track from the fascinating documentary “Grizzly Man”. As the song proceeds, nature slowly fades from the landscape as referenced by an old timer.

47. Dead Queen – Espers

Enthralling, rambling mystical piece that envokes a sense of timelessness and general wonderment.

Sample

46. Peacebone – Animal Collective

A bouncy, fascinating ride through Animal Collective’s distorted psyche. Happiness encapsulated in musical format.

45. With Crippled Wings – Lift to Experience

A christian rock band delivers the goods in a big way. The sample is the live version, which is inferior to the studio. Try and get your hands on it.

Sample

44. The Scientist – Coldplay

Well done mainstream pop, nothing to apologize for and something sorely lacking this decade.

43. Holy Smokes – Aesop Rock

If Fred Flinstone was in hip hop, I think he would have been like Aesop Rock. Vocal hooks and a slinky melodic synth line will seep into your soul. “I knew it!”.

42. My Immortal – Evanescence

One of the biggest songs of the decade. Beautifully sung with a melody producers would cheat and steal for. True beauty in a sea of auto-tune garbage.

41. I Kissed a Girl – Katy Perry

The song that had all the soccer moms upset, but also had them thinking about their own possible experimentation earlier in life. This song single handedly fucked with suburbia badly, and that’s always a good thing.

Self-proclaimed “greatest rapper alive’s” third and final installment of Tha Carter exceeds expectations set by previous material. Overrated and adored by many critics, and underrated by self-ascribed hip-hop heads, Weezy’s ability is streaky. On any given track, out of control nonsense and unexpectedly engrossing rhymes can both be equally expected. In the recent past, these two balanced one another out, leading to solid, but not spectacular mix tapes and features. In Tha Carter III, Lil’ Wayne manages to play far above this level, providing engrossing rhymes over some superb beats.

1. 3 Peat: 8.5

The album’s lead track sets Lil’ Wayne against a rich backdrop – packed with strings, varying beats, and flangy synth sound. Wayne’s raspy voice enters next, bringing his hallmark overconfidence, non-sequiturs, and oddball creativity to the table instantly. The entire track is completely over the top, but works well as the first song off of the album.

2. Mr. Carter: 8.8

Someone needs to explain to Lil’ Wayne that his pre-song monologues only detract from the rest of the track. Here he clarifies that this song’s beat makes him feel ‘big’ – in the sense of ability, not weight, that is. Perhaps I overestimate, but forgive me for thinking that 100% of listeners could have guessed the true meaning. Rant and monologue over, the track is outstanding. Jay-Z is a welcome feature; his softer flow acts as a nice foil to Wayne’s rasp.

3. A Milli: 2.5

Bangledesh provides the weakest beat on the album, which mostly consists of a digitally lowered voice repeating ‘A Milli’ over weak snare and other assorted drums. Someone should explain to ‘Bangledesh’ both that his name has already been taken, and that his beat is actually just the same two words on repeat. Wayne’s rhymes don’t rescue the song – he’s made a living with his eccentric lyrics, but here he crosses the line and comes off sounding more amateurish than fascinating.

4. Got Money: 5.0

Wayne’s most commercial track thus far, Got Money features the styling of T-Pain. The beat lacks any revolutionary quality, but serves its purpose well. The track is excellently produced, and as one of the two obligatory club tracks, it’s hard to find too much fault. Of course, there is an unfortunate other side of not straying from an old standard, and this track falls prey to sounding formulaic.

5. Comfortable:6.0

The first Kanye beat is underwhelming and laid back, with smooth strings and a Babyface hook juxtaposed against some clever lyrics from Lil’ Wayne. Unfortunately, the track as a whole comes off sounding like everyone involved was on autopilot. It’s a nice song, and, as Wayne says, “everyone is gonna like this one.” Unfortunately, there will be very few that love it.

6. Phone Home: 9.3

It’s hard to judge a track like this. Perhaps in an effort to top Lupe’s cheeseburger point of view, Weezy claims alien descent, and spends the majority of the track asserting various other oddities. This said, the song comes off as brilliant rather than forced. Cool and Dre’s beat is ridiculously layered, with piano, heavy bass, hyped up hook, and liberal doses of synth. They play with the sound excellently, dropping and inserting portions of the beat throughout the song, resulting in one of the best on the CD. Lil’ Wayne matches Cool and Dre’s work with an interesting rhyme scheme and a sound of genuine interest. It’s a risky track, both in concept and style, but it works, making it the highlight of the album.

7. Dr. Carter: 8.9

Swizz Beatz provides a jazzy sound, different from his normal work, but quite well done. The track’s theme is speciously unique, but Wayne seems to be enjoying himself, and gets an A for effort. Like Phone Home, Weezy takes a risk with Dr. Carter. Although it unfortunately doesn’t come off as well, it is enjoyable nonetheless, and is worth repeated listens.

8. Tie My Hands:8.3

Unlike many other songs on Tha Carter III, this track is rather stripped down. Featuring a couple of guitars and a smooth bass everything about this song is wholly enjoyable. Weezy spends most of his time on this album rapping with force, racing the beat to the end of the track. Tie My Hands is the opposite; Wayne picks his spots, allowing himself and the listener to really enjoy the melody.

9. Shoot Me Down: 9.2

Kanye provides one of the best beats on the CD, and Weezy does not let it go to waste. He proceeds along the track with a sound of controlled rage, keeping listeners engrossed throughout. The song deserves several replays to fully appreciate, due not only to the production and Wayne’s flow, but also to the way that the two entities come together perfectly.

10. Playing with Fire: 9.1

Streetrunner provides the album with yet another great beat, and Lil’ Wayne’s stream of consciousness works well here. Most rap would come off forced trying to link something as obscure as wine to cereal, but Weezy pulls it off with seeming ease.

11. Lollipop: 5.5

The first single off the album is certainly well made. With a catchy beat, innuendo-laden hook, and mash up of rap and r&b, the track has club single written all over it. Like most poppy club tracks, it is not the strongest song off of the CD, and has potential to win most overplayed song of summer award. All this said, the song would have garnered a 6/10 if not for the decision to refer to lovely lady lumps. That’s an automatic lost of half a point, no exceptions.

12. La La: 6.5

The beat sounds like some type of Oompa-Loompa meets Wizard of Oz munchkin creation. It’s certainly not the best beat on the CD, and as a stand-alone track, it makes little sense. As part of Tha Carter III it is more endearing than that, providing another sound, and adding to the album as a whole. The decision to include Busta Rhymes on this track has a similar effect, leaving the listener a little scared, and a little excited.

13. Nothin, On Me: 6.0

The album returns to beats more familiar, and a grimy, synth beginning is met with some borderline lyrics from Juelz. Wayne enters a little later, with an odd voice effect. The entire track is off, with Juelz taking center stage for most of the track. By the time Wayne enters all but the most adherent and thorough have likely moved on.

14. Let the Beat Build: 6.0

The beat certainly has a Kanye sound, and, although certainly very good, takes center stage, displacing Wayne. He sounds as if he’s following the beat, and comes off sounding less comfortable than normal.

15. Mrs. Officer: 4.0

The song is nice, with a pretty enough sound, but is far less engrossing than most other tracks on the CD. Wayne is at his best with only a loose central theme, and perhaps it is the restriction on this that gives off the mundane feel.

16. Misunderstood: 4.8

The instrumentation has an older feel to it, which is mildly interesting, but clocking in at almost 10 minutes, this track is just too long. It’s the length that hurts the song more than anything else – Wanye holds the listener’s attention and the hook is likewise interesting. Of course this is all relatively irrelevant after 3 minutes in, when Weezy stops rapping and begins preaching. His diatribe is somewhat interesting, but has been heard before many times, and far more eloquently put.

Album Total 6.4/10

You can buy a hard copy here:

Tha Carter III