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(52 votes, average: 2.33 out of 5)
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Once upon a time there was a crazy, maniacal rock singer with a voice that could implode glass who owned the music world. His power was so strong, even Teen Spirit could not take him down. He and his bandmates had a drug-induced falling out. At that point, the crazy rock singer walked up the hill into his mansion, shut the door and disappeared for 16 or so years. During that time, there were rumors of material, of a much vaunted album. It never really surfaced, just swimming in the murky depths, with maybe a few glimpes here and there of a tail or a silvery side.

As the rock singer sat in his mansion on the hill, locked away, we saw boy bands come and go, rap rock arrive and die, nu-metal poison the airwaves and very careful, very image pretentious alternative acts whine and mumble their way through some of the most boring records in rock history. Rock was dying. Jack White tried his best. He really did. But the complete album just wasn’t there. The same for The Drive By Truckers and the Hold Steady, all excellent rock acts.

We saw the rise and slow fall of the ever self aware indie scene, hundreds of wimpified, supposed rock albums that had the staying power of a Linux nerd and a five star hooker. We saw the rise of gangsta rap, and it’s slow decline, giving way to the pop ambitions of Kanye.

All this time the crazy old rock singer sat inside, waiting to release this little album he’d been working on. Would people still even remember him? Would they care that he looked different, acted different and put on some pounds? Would people still even care about the music? The crazy old rock singer rubbed his beard and pondered as he sat by the fire. “Fuck it”, he says. Release the thing anyway.

1. Chinese Democracy 8.5/10

The track opens with what sounds like the seagull from “Echoes”, then gives way to chattering voices and a huge windy buildup of vocals pushing a guitar riff.

Axl warns the listener that “you’ll find out for yourself”. A great, roaring opener which conveys that the album means business.

2. Shacklers Revenge. 9/10

I don’t believe there’s a reason

This song is all about the chorus. The guitar work is phenomenal, and Axl’s passionate vocals maintain an edge that is rare for a 46 year old front man. At around 2:35 seconds in, Wizard of Oz-ish chants back up the drumming creating an eerie effect.

3. Better 10/10

The greatest single all out rock song since Everlong. An absolutely astonishing melody – tight and brimming with side ideas. Axl is in perfect form here.

So bittersweet, this tragedy wont ask for absolution,
This melody inside of me, still searches for solution

So many things are thrown into this track, and they all work. The song takes you into different directions, throws in blistering guitar solos and outstanding high energy vocals. Bands don’t do this sort of anything anymore because they can’t pull it off.

4. Street of Dreams 9.5/10

What I thought was beautiful, don’t live inside of you anymore

The first of many rock ballads on Chinese Democracy. The piano is Elton-esque, the flourishes Queen, but it’s all Axl. There are furious guitar solos, orchestral swells and just the sound of a broken hearted dude. The ending is stunning. If only many current rock bands put this much effort and passion into a track.

5. If The World 9.1/10

The song opens with a junky bass line and quasi-hip hop beat. It then grows into this kind of psychedelic sounding monsoon, with lush strings flowing one way and the funky soup flowing the other, twisting the listeners world in half while Axl’s crystal clear vocals split down the middle.

6. There Was a Time 9.4/10

Seems to be about a promiscuous ex girlfriend or wife. Great string work bobs in and out of the pounding drums. Good melodies appear from every crack in the music, layered deeply and powerful. Intense guitar solos fill out the second half, hammering the giant lumbering rhythm into submission. Axl lets loose with some of the most soulfully demonic vocals we’ve heard on a rock album in years.

7. Catcher In The Rye 10/10

There was a time I’d see their face and wish I had a gun

An absolutely bizarre, preposterous and beautiful song with more changeups than Dice K. No one writes this sort of thing anymore. But that doesn’t mean it’s dated. It’s impossibly modern and forward thinking. The melodies are first rate, and change quite often, one swapping out for the other. This is not the restrained, horribly self aware music from the current rock world favorites. This is something on an entire level differently. The piano that seeps it’s way up the mix ladder at around 4:50 is pretty incredible, giving the song a 3rd dimensional buoyancy.

8. Scraped 9/10

The one track that feels like Axl is trying to relive a bit of the “Appetite” style. That said, he does manage to make it an interesting ride, with an excellent vocal and band performance.

9. Riad N’ the Bedouins 9.3/10

Another track that sounds more like something from “Appetite”, but with a glossier sheen. The aggression and edge is still present in spades. The absolutely ferocious vocal performance and guitar work make this a fantastic track.

10. Sorry 9.7/10

You close your eyes
All well and good
I’ll kick you ass
Like I said that I would

A powerful, venomous ballad that sounds like a vindictive madman plotting out those responsible for heinous acts. The melodies are all over the place, subsequently being hammered by power guitar solos.

Axl launches into a triumphant, kinetic chorus of nobody owes you not one god damned thing. The vocal work and musicianship are great, but that’s not what sells it. It’s the sincerity of the thing. You *believe* it. This isn’t Ryan Adams trying to sell you another fake soap opera.

11. IRS 8.9/10

Gonna call the president, gonna get myself a private eye

This is another pure bred rocker that screams with adrenaline, only to slow down in a couple parts, then pick back up again. The melody, like most Chinese Democracy tracks is exceptional.

12. Madagascar 9.6/10

Axl sings this track like a long lost explorer who returned home from the wilderness, only to find he was never really lost at all. His voice weary and resigned, full of regret and fatigue, except when he needs to bring the goods.

I won’t be told anymore
That I’ve been brought down in this storm
And left so far out from the shore
And I can’t find my way back, my way anymore

There’s a collage of movie samples, from Cool Hand Luke to Braveheart mixed in with some Martin Luther king snippets that add a bit of tension to the track.

13. This I Love 9.7/10

This is just an infectious, bizarre song that shows Axl’s true genius. There’s just so much going on. The lyrics aren’t the most cutting edge, but the outstanding music covers that issue. At first you get the feeling it’s more like the hair metal ballads of the late 80’s. But it’s much more updated than that. And once again it’s about the musicianship and the melodies. Sure, any decent rock act can make you *feel* if they hit it right. The reason the “big guns” *are* the big guns is because they can make you feel while playing and singing well. Somewhere along the way, this kid of vocal and instrument mastery was shunned – and music has been worse because of it.

14. Prostitute 10/10

It’s all over the place. It’s bombastic, it’s nonsensical at moments. It’s melodic. Wait, no it’s not….wait yes it is once again. The vocals are all over the place. What is Axl screaming about?

Where Would You Go If I Told You I Loved You And Then Walked Away?

The end of Prostitute is one of the most stunning in music history. We hear the splashy, happy beat, and Axl’s desperate vocals suddenly and completely demolished by what sounds like the biggest guitar in the world and building sized brass hits. After assaulting the main passage like a giant black bear taking a young fawn, the attack quiets down and we are treated to a slow ending of sweet strings and a melancholy piano. It’s like you can almost see that red tinted, hazy Hollywood Hills sunset view out the crazy old rock stars window.

Response Keywords after hearing this album:

high energy, bombastic, ambitious, bizarre, well crafted, sincere, powerful, artistic, operatic

Album Total 9.4/10

Chinese Democracy is the single most remarkable rock comeback of all time. The album is a masterpiece.

It comes out Nov 23rd at Best Buy in the U.S. and at the regular places overseas.