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(52 votes, average: 2.33 out of 5)
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Once upon a time there was a crazy, maniacal rock singer with a voice that could implode glass who owned the music world. His power was so strong, even Teen Spirit could not take him down. He and his bandmates had a drug-induced falling out. At that point, the crazy rock singer walked up the hill into his mansion, shut the door and disappeared for 16 or so years. During that time, there were rumors of material, of a much vaunted album. It never really surfaced, just swimming in the murky depths, with maybe a few glimpes here and there of a tail or a silvery side.
As the rock singer sat in his mansion on the hill, locked away, we saw boy bands come and go, rap rock arrive and die, nu-metal poison the airwaves and very careful, very image pretentious alternative acts whine and mumble their way through some of the most boring records in rock history. Rock was dying. Jack White tried his best. He really did. But the complete album just wasn’t there. The same for The Drive By Truckers and the Hold Steady, all excellent rock acts.
We saw the rise and slow fall of the ever self aware indie scene, hundreds of wimpified, supposed rock albums that had the staying power of a Linux nerd and a five star hooker. We saw the rise of gangsta rap, and it’s slow decline, giving way to the pop ambitions of Kanye.
All this time the crazy old rock singer sat inside, waiting to release this little album he’d been working on. Would people still even remember him? Would they care that he looked different, acted different and put on some pounds? Would people still even care about the music? The crazy old rock singer rubbed his beard and pondered as he sat by the fire. “Fuck it”, he says. Release the thing anyway.
1. Chinese Democracy 8.5/10
The track opens with what sounds like the seagull from “Echoes”, then gives way to chattering voices and a huge windy buildup of vocals pushing a guitar riff.
Axl warns the listener that “you’ll find out for yourself”. A great, roaring opener which conveys that the album means business.